Astute observation from another person, if I may say so. At least I felt validated in my feelings of panic and depression when he gave that comment. I had reason to go mad, and I could blame it on the series of circumstances around me. Or I could stand up, walk, and live.
I had coffee with a good friend in between a busy day for both of us. I looked up to this friend, for she had it all - beauty, brains, talents, husband, career, kids, community. While I could not even figure out where I would be nine years from now (a question I had to answer for an insurance agent). I was poised and ready to pour out my heartaches to this trusted, dependable friend.
I was surprised that she had her fair share of woes. I said how could she complain when she, let me repeat it, had it all? I used to sing "I just want to be where you are" to this girl (instead of to God, I know, idolatry). I told her she should be thankful she had someone to share life with, her triumphs and failures, her dreams and miseries. I reminded her that single people went through life insecure and alone at times.
She said that when you get married, your problems are multiplied. Aside from your own family's concerns, you absorb your husband's family's issues, your yaya's, your helper's, your driver's, and it would seem as if no one would eat in your household if you don't wake up early enough to make the decisions.
Just when I was falling down regarding my own troubles, this friend of mine also wanted to rebel against everyone and to be irresponsible for one second. We both could not afford to.
The bottom line was that we were no longer young and we had to face our responsibilities as adults. We were each on the side where the other thought that the grass was greener, and we reminded each other that it was not. We did not give in to hopelessness and despair. As sisters in Christ, we remembered that we could go through life - however broken or broke we'd become - in Him who strengthened us.
My circumstances have not changed but bit by bit, I am gaining acceptance of it all.
By the way, do visit the blog of another friend of mine, http://cautionstudentdriver.blogspot.com. Her entries are both heartwarming and funny. Her outlook in life is both fresh and refreshing. She lives up to her name: Gay.